Not-Oscars 2020

This year’s Not Oscars are really not the Oscars, because the Oscars aren’t happening for another three months and there’s still six weeks left in the eligibility window for new contenders to pop up. I’ve seen all the likely nominees from 2020 and several more yet to be officially released, but some buzzed about performances […]

Top Ten Films: 2020

“We are gathered here today in remembrance of The Motion Picture. To bid it adieu, and to share some of our fondest memories from its final year. Thank you very much to Netflix for providing the catering at this difficult time.” That’s how I opened last year’s top ten list — with a mock eulogy […]

The Not-Oscars 2014

Once again, it’s Oscar time. This year’s race is gearing up to be one of the least predictable in recent memory. For every race that has an all-but-guaranteed winner (Julianne Moore, Best Actress; J.K. Simmons, Best Supporting Actor), there are as many that are truly up in the air — some with not only two […]

‘Gone Girl’ Wild: Marriage & Media Are The Real Killers

Marriage is a contract. We select one person we love and trust, and pledge to continue loving and trusting them until our dying breath. We give them equal stake in all our assets. We promise to be with them and them only. We will eat, sleep, and travel with this person. Their friends become our […]